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 MISSION S.P.O.R.K. - Beyond Nightmares 5

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PostSubject: MISSION S.P.O.R.K. - Beyond Nightmares 5   Fri Jul 27, 2012 2:42 am



{|Mission Start|}

Quote :
--Chris's POV--
I was about to die by Wesker and before I did, I fell to the ground and Wesker fell on his back and I looked up and saw the one person I am really glad to see so I said happily,
-Chris:"Sky, your alive...?" I looked down and saw a bite on her arm and I said looking at her, "Sky...your hurt."

No, stop! Flag on the play! Bullshit! Chris had to bulk up to the point people think he's on steriods to be able to have a chance against Wesker in close quarters combat and Skysue runs in and manages to knock them away from each other in a second flat? Bullshit!

Quote :
-Sky:"I'll be fine Chris, and don't worry." Wesker got up and look at Sky and Sky got in fighting stance and she said, "It's time to pay for hurting Chris blondie, I'm here to collect." he smirked and said,
-Wesker:"Your protecting him, how stupid."
-Sky:"Uh, nah duh I'm protecting him whata think - if I let him die I'd only have one other guy on my side to dote on me, you know? That's unacceptable!."
-Wesker:"Then your weak as them."

Close, but no cigar, Wesker! I'd hazard to guess she's technically weaker than everyone else if it wasn't for the power of influence the virus has over everyone.

Quote :
-Sky:"I show you who's weak." she started to attack him and (Okay, for most of you who knows FF7AC with Tifa VS Loz fight so yeah thats how the fight is now) she kicked him and punched him and he attacked her too but it didn't effect her a bit. Til Wesker fell to the floor and Sky grab her head and fell to her knees, so I ran to her and help her up and we heard a strange sound (FF7 battle won sound) and Wesker got up and answered his cell and said,
-Wesker:"WHAT!!!....I know...I am bringing the girl..." he hanged up and he disappeared and I saw him went behind Sky and knocked her out and she fell and he knocked me out too and...

So for those of you who aren't familiar with Final Fantasy this is the fight she is speaking of;

As you can see she's clearly got no imagination of her own so Hananiwa was forced to rip off a movie for her fight scenes and even for the humor at the end of the fight. A little tip for future reference - you want to know why the victory fanfare being Loz's ring tone was funny in the movie? BECAUSE IT WAS MAKING A CRACK AT ITS OWN GAME!


Quote :
--Wesker's POV--
I just knocked out Chris and Sky and I picked her up and Chris and left to the City Hall and I ran with speed and when I reached the door, someone shot me in the leg and I fell and Sky was quicklybeen picked up andIsaw Leon with Skyand a blonde man I never seen before and he said,
-???:"What you did is the wrong move." I got up and said to the man,
-Wesker:"Who are you?"
-Neo:"I'm Neo Roanoke the Commander for TURK, and this girls Stepfather, and your under arest Albert Wesker come quietly or this has to get ugly." I didn't want to do nothing right now with a shot leg, so I ran off to the Lad and...

Wait, commander of the Turks? But that's strictly a Final Fantasy VII organization - what are the Turks doing here? Once again, we're shown the complete lack of originality that Hananiwa possesses. She doesn't write out fight scenes because she can't think up any good ones unless she steals them straight out of other media. She can't think of original viruses without running into the cliches which do her no good because she can't make them sound decent. She also can't think up any original groups to use so she has to steal, once again, from other media to fit her needs.

Quote :
--Leon's POV--
Wesker ran off...figures. Why is it sounding like he always runs off? He keeps himself at a schedule - he even takes the time to only spare seven minutes to fight with you in RE5. Neo sighed and said while turningto Sky who is still in my arms,
-Neo:"It figures he would do that. Hey did you say that their were another one with you?"
-Leon:"Yeah,he's Chris Redfield, he is in STARS."

No, Chris is not in S.T.A.R.S. - not anymore. After the fall of Raccoon City S.T.A.R.S. is no more as that was an elite faction of the police force for that city.

Quote :
-Neo:"Alright, I'll go get him then. Leon, look after Skylar, I'll be back." he left and Skymoved alittle and opened her eyes and I said to her,
-Leon:"Hello beautiful, sleep well." she look at me and said,
-Sky:"Leon?"
-Leon:"The one and only beautiful." It must be fun to praise yourself. she blush alittle and I thought it'll be hard to get her effections. So she wigled out of my arms and she said,
-Sky:"Where's Chris?"
-Leon:"Oh him...your stepdad went to get him."
-Sky:"You saw my dad?"
-Leon:"Yeah, we get along very well, like he is my own dad."

Here's the problem with trying to insert any of Leon's family into fanfics - any family he may have is never mentioned. Awfully convenient for Hananiwa as it just gives these two 'common ground' - even though neither of them have complimenting personalities or shared hobbies to truly bring them closer together.

Quote :
-Sky:"Oh, okay then let's go already." she walked away and I walked up beside her and put my arm on her shoulds and she looked at me and said, "Why did you do that?"
-Leon:"Cause I like you."
-Sky:"Not now." then she ran off and I behind her and w started to look around the City Hall and...

Because Skysue is the epitome of how we all should act - screaming and attracting enemies to the group and all that.

Quote :

Leon is so HOT and so SEXY

this is Neo Roanoke Sky and Elliot's Stepfather

Til next time Bye

I do adore how she insists on still using images to tell readers what she wants her characters to look like instead of trying her hand at any type of descriptive prose.

{|X|}

The young woman slunk through the alleyways of the run down and desolate city. In her hands she gripped a riot gun, her preferred primary firearm. Even if these new enemies were faster getting in nice and tight and blasting them with the riot gun ought to be enough to blow them back and give her running room again, so long as her ammo held out. She continued to move through the debris and corpses, dark eyes searching. Once she got the samples she needed she should be good to go.

Finally, after nearly fifteen minutes of constant rushing in order to keep herself from being a stationary target she ran across what she needed. It was no doubt what she had heard described as a 'Tamil' over the video feed though she had no idea what it could actually do - or did, as this one's head was smashed against the concrete from the M.S. carrier's attack.

Her gaze darted around her as she crouched at the decaying body, eyeing the strange animal mutations that had started and wondering just what the purpose of it was. Harnessing animals in the experiments didn't always have the expected results as the instincts of the B.O.W. afterwards were often un-tame-able. The Hunter B.O.W.s were one such example.

Digging through the pouches at her belt the dark-haired woman quickly produced a syringe and wasted no more time in obtaining a blood sample from the deceased creature. Storing it away into a small pouch stuffed with padding to keep any samples she obtained on the field safe she stood, a hand at the earpiece she wore.

"I have received a sample of the AT-virus. I'll be able to send it off once I finish this video feed." Her voice was muffled behind the gas mask but was still able to be heard by the man on the other end of the ear piece.

"Affirmative. Continue with your mission, Fang."

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PostSubject: Re: MISSION S.P.O.R.K. - Beyond Nightmares 5   Sun Feb 02, 2014 2:16 pm


What is even going on? I don't know what chapter it was on, but there was that one fight scene where that tam-thing that comes at them and Chris swoops in, protects her, they go flying through a window then hit a wall, THEN Chris flies out a window and hits a wall. ??? what? Did I read it wrong or could my brain just not process the confusing structure of the sentence? So, they fly out a window and slam into a wall, but then Chris is sent out through another window and slams into a wall but ends up in the same room as Sky? Was there a portal hole she forgot to mention that brought Chris back to the room she was in? Does she have a portal gun that she used, but forgot to mention she had it and used it? I probably did read the sentence wrong....

Why am I hurting my brain with these questions? Why do I even...even?

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