Illegal Operations: Project K Chronicles, Resident Evil [16]

Resident Evil:The Project K Chronicles {Leon S.Kennedy} pt.16 Well, This Was Unexpected

Karla thought her life couldn't get any worse...

Fang: All I'm getting from that is MOAR needless drama and suffering ahoy! .... In fact. Beltway! Get yer fat ass in here!

Beltway: What? I don't want any fuckin' part of this and you know that!

Fang: Ah, but what you don't know is I got dirt on you courtesy of Spectre. So get yer ass in here and take a seat.

Beltway: ... You slept with him for it, didn't you?

Fang: *glares at Beltway for a moment**dryly* Yes. That's exactly how that happened.

Beltway: Great, Oki'll be happy to hear that shit.

Fang: Yer fuckin' stupid, you know that, right? *is blatantly ignored*

Leon angrily ended the never answered call

Beltway: How in the fuck do you end an unanswered call? That shit just ends itself!

Fang: Must be a talent. A very unnecessary talent, but a talent none-the-less.

as he began to pace the floor; he stopped once he heard a knock on the door to Kaplan’s apartment.

Fang: Why is Leon at Kaplan's place?

Beltway: If they start screwin' each other I'm leaving. I don't care what dirt you fucking have on me. I will leave and you will not stop me!

Fang: Yeah, if that starts happening you'll have to race me out the door because I'll be right with you on that one.

He briskly walked towards it, his socks making soundless footsteps against the dark red carpeting.

He unlocked the door and opened it only to find that FBI agent standing there, “Can I help you?”

Fang: That FBI agent?

Beltway: *snorts* Sounds to me like someone just got fuckin' lazy when it came to actually writin' out side characters.

“Hello again Leon, I’m afraid I’m going to ask you to come down with me to the corner’s office, a woman was found dead at the docks.”

Fang: Y'know, I have no idea what the fuck a "corner's office" is. I do know what a coroner's office is however.

Beltway: I'm a little more distracted by the fact that they didn't just call the man instead of showing up at someone else's doorstep to find him to identify the body.

Fang: Leon must show up so often at Kaplan's place to bump uglies that it's commonplace now.

Beltway: Fang, ya little shit! I do not need the image of two guys porkin' each other in my head!

Leon raised a brow at him with confusion and Don read it perfectly. “It’s not Karla.”

Fang: If it was Karla-Sue we'd have been rejoicing most merrily.

Beltway: "Most merrily?" You're fucking weird.

Leon sighed relieved, “Alright I’ll get my shoes.”

Fang: Does that mean if it had been Karla-Sue he wouldn't have gone to get his shoes?

Beltway: I repeat; you're fucking weird. It's amazing you're not that damn creepy kid in the corner in danger of committing mass murder.

Fang: Huh... That sounds remotely close to something I told Spectre at one point....

The drive to the corner’s office seemed slow and quiet, at least for Leon that was. Don was the quiet one and normally the Feds were all about talk and being dicks;

Fang: ....? Since when...?

Beltway: Since this stupid bitch decided using steroetypes sufficed as real characterization. No, you wanna know who the real pricks are? The fuckin' military.

Fang: You're just mad at them because they discharged you dishonorably.

Beltway: *glares at the side of Fang's head*

Don was the sheer opposite of that. Leon did have to admit that the agent went out of his way to help his girl-, ex girlfriend and now she was somewhere out there with a man that she should despise no matter what he offered.

“The reason I’m bringing you along is because it seems that you’ll be able to identify the woman.” Don broke the silence as he spared a glance at Leon.

Beltway/Fang: No shit?

Fang: Why else would they have come found him to look at a body?

Beltway: For shits and giggles maybe. Everyone in this thing is fuckin' retarded after all. They seem the type to sit and poke a body with a stick and snicker like a couple a' chucklefucks.

“When did she die?”

“Authorities discovered her body earlier this morning around late midnight, she had been shot twice. No casings were found.”

“And you want me to identify the body because I look like a ladies man?”

Don cracked a smile, “Exactly.”

Fang:

Beltway: Are you gonna stop that shit anytime soon or am I gonna have to explain for you?

Fang: Why would they call him just because he's a ladies man? That's not how this works!

Beltway: For any fuckin' morons out there who can't figure it out; Fang's flippin' her shit because they called him for a reason other than they thought he would have a connection to the deceased.

Fang: Exactly! They don't just call on random fuckheads! They find out who may have a connection with the deceased and then call them up to come in and identify the body!

Beltway: Fang, if you don't stop bangin' your head offa that fuckin' table I'm gonna duck tape you to the chair 'till you can't move!

“Ah.”

“I had hoped that we would have found Karla by now, but it seems like she’s eluding us.”

Fang: You know, since Karla-Sue is a wanted felon - most likely for most if not all of the states, due to what she's been framed for by her doppelganger - then Claire and Chris would be taken in once she was found for harboring a criminal.

Beltway: That actually sounds like a damn good idea. Any way I can phone in to the police from this room?

Fang: Sadly no, and Karla-Sue has the police wrapped around her little finger so well that Agent Assface that is Don Matthews would just make sure she was all comfy and happy with her situation even if she was caught again.

Beltway: Well that just completely defeats the purpose of the prisoner concept.

“Copy that.”

Don turned into the parking lot as he turned off the car and both men exited the vehicle while walking hastily towards the building. They walked towards the office and Don much to Leon’s surprise threw the door open which happened to startle the old corner.

Fang: What the fuck is the purpose of throwin' the door open? For dramatic entrance reasons?

“Agent Matthews, Agent Kennedy. Come in, I just received Red’s body as they brought her in a couple of hours ago.”

Fang: "Red?" Really?

Leon shook off the nerve racking filling that he would know who was under the sheet before them; he looked towards Don as the agent inclined his head towards the body.

“He’s here to see if he can identify our Jane Doe.”

The old corner nodded and proceeded to pull the sheet back, Leon stood frozen. Oh god it was her. Ada Wong, the woman who helped him in Raccoon and Spain laid there peacefully like an angel. Her skin deathly pale and her magenta pink lips actually turned blue from the coldness of her body, Leon inhaled deeply before exhaling.

Fang: So much for the bitch in the red dress. Krauser will be disappointed he didn't get to brutally murder her.

Beltway: You sound a little sad yourself there.

Fang: Mostly because she was so OOC that I didn't get a chance to enjoy her painful death scene....

Beltway: ... Seriously.... You fucking worry me sometimes.

“Do you know her?” Don asked sincerely with genuine kindness and sympathy.

Leon couldn’t think straight and he felt like he would throw up his breakfast anytime soon, this could defiantly not be happening. First Karla disappears and now Ada dies?

Beltway: I'd personally be overjoyed that the tapeworm that Karla is has up and disappeared.

No, this had to be someone else…but yet she wore a red dress and heels, had the similar black leg holster. Yes, it was Ada.

Beltway/Fang:

Fang: This Leon is so monumentally fucking stupid that he identifies Ada only by what she is wearing!

Beltway: Makes me wonder if Wong had been dressed up in Smith's clothes would he have identified the damn body as Smith's?

Leon would regret this action for the rest of his life, but if he didn’t they would hold him responsible since he had known that she had stolen those viruses. They would know that he let her get away with it and cause so many lives lost.

Beltway/Fang:

Beltway: Wong helped Kennedy out?

Fang: Yeah, off camera. There is no evidence damning her that she had gotten hold of those viruses and passed them on to more dangerous hands. None. If there had been we would have heard somewhere in the timeline that Ada was a wanted felon for illegally passing on of viruses used in bioterrorism.

Beltway: Great, so we're being subjected to this dumbass motherfuckin' scene just for the sake of more repetitive drama? I'm gettin' the urge to just blow this shit sky high and be done with it entirely!

Forgive me, “No.” Leon shook his head and held his best poker face he could put on. And yet he felt so sick of himself.

Don and the corner bought his actions, “Take fingerprints and I’ll process this woman.”

“Of course.” The old corner said as Don took one more glance at Leon only to see him diverting his gaze from the body.

“That’ll be all Robertson.” Don said and both he and Leon exited the building.

Fang: Who the hell was he talking to then?

Beltway: Fuck if I know. He should have said that to Kennedy telling him his time there was up - they got what they wanted from him. Is Robertson supposed to be the coroner?

Fang: I... think....? *shrugs, still confused*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, are you going to tell me what happened?”

“I will if you promise not to bug.” You teased as Chris nodded and focused on driving you back to his place where Becky and BillyBenny were watching Milla.

Beltway: The fuck is this shit? Whatever happened to this little shithead bein' a wanted felon?

Fang: Completely ignored now as Gabby15cancer doesn't need the drama it brings in as of the moment.

Beltway: So these happy assholes are just driving down the street with their heads up their asses and not worrying about her criminal status and Redfield harboring that criminal? This is the worst fuckin' shit I've ever been forced to read and that includes all those shitty little books you have to read in high school!

Fang: Yeah, get used to that. No one is ever inconvenienced for realism in these fics; if they are it's only for the sake of the half-baked plot.

“Well, Ada called I met her at the docks just like she asked me to, we were discussing things…and that’s when he showed up,” you stated bitterly. “He asked me to join Mercury and when I refused he shot her. The bullets he used were poisonous bullets and that eventually killed her; he would’ve killed me too if it weren’t for my birth father Ricardo coming to save me in time…from there Demitri disappeared and I was there by Ada’s side as she died…Wesker was there too and he demanded that I go back with him but I refused. He left me there to deal with the cops but I asked Ricardo to take me to Claire’s.” you finish as Chris reached over and held your hand in his.

Beltway: Bullshit. This is bullshit.

Fang: Don't have to tell me twice! I just find it interesting that she's completely over being shocked, depressed and what-have-you over witnessing first-hand Ada's painful, organ-disintegrating death as it happened after swapping spit with Chris.

Beltway: If shaggin' someone solved all my problems I'd be so neck deep in-

Fang: That's enough outta you! We got virgin ears 'round these parts!

Beltway: Who? You? Might explain some shit. Maybe you and Spectre should go for a romp. Loosen ya both up.

Fang: *glares death and hellfire at Beltway* I am going to smother you with a pillow in your sleep. And stop talking to Oki. That shit ain't happenin'.

Beltway: *completely unfazed* Yeah, we'll see. You're both fuckin' weird, after all.

Fang: *buries face in hands**grumbles* I don't know why I bother.... I just can't win with you two....

“I’m sorry about that. But you do understand that you’re gonna have to call Leon sometime you know, he was worried just as much as I was.”

Fang: You mean as worried as they should be for harboring a wanted felon in broad daylight?

“Yeah, yeah I know.” You muttered and sooner than you would have expected you ended up at the apartment and walked in.

Beltway: Reading and writing aren't my thing and even I can write better timed shit than that!

“Karla!” you would have expected it from Milla but instead Rebecca came up and hugged you so tightly you had to wedge your way out from her grasp.

Beltway: .... Why?

Fang: Because they're just supposed to be the bestest buddies evar despite the fact that we never actually see them act as such.

“It’s good to see you too Becky.” You looked over at BillyBenny and saw him smirk.

“How’s it going doll face?”

“Still with that aren’t you?” you muttered as Milla ran up to you and immediately hugged you by your waist.

“I vas so worried.” She murmured while burying her face in your torso as you stroked her hair and kneeled at her eye level.

“I’m so sorry for leaving, it won’t happen again despite the fact that I am a nationally wanted felon and everyone here would be under arrest for harboring me if this were to get out.”

“Promise?” she said while looking up at you.

You nodded, “Promise.” You look from her to Chris. “How's Kaplan and Sheva?”

“Both will be fine, Sheva just bruised her hip and Kaplan is stable.” You nodded and sat back down on the couch as Milla joined you.

“I owe Kaplan an apology.” You murmured thoughtfully.

“You don’t owe him crap.” snapped Chris as the four of you looked towards him, his eyes were narrowed upon you as he crossed his arms with that deep scowl still on his rugged features.

Fang:

“Chris-”

“Don’t Chris me Karla; Kaplan had the nerve to accuse you of shooting him and burning BETA down to a crisp ember.”

Fang:

Beltway: What the fuck is wrong with you now? See? This is why you're a fuckin' weirdo!

Fang: Kaplan saw Karla-Sue's clone commit those acts! He had no way of knowing about the stupid clone because Karla-Sue is a fucking assclown who neglected to tell anyone the clone even existed and was out to kill her and everyone around her for shits and giggles! Kaplan had every reason to accuse Karla-Sue because in his eyes it was Karla-Sue who did those things!

Beltway: Look, I know this shit is bad beyond bad but you need to calm your tits. We're gettin' you fuckin' laid later. Maybe that's all you need.

Fang:

“But technically it was me…or the evil side of me.” You reasoned as you got up from your spot on the couch and walked up to him. “So far only you, Sheva, and I, and now Becky and BillyBenny know about K19.”

Fang: And this entire fiasco could have been avoided with Kaplan if you all weren't complete fucking retards and told people this twisted, homicidal clone of you existed in the first place!

Beltway: Let it go, Fang. We all know it's bad, you pointed that shit out already - clearly the author doesn't give a flying rat's ass so why should we?

Fang: Because she's an arrogant, egocentric asshat who thinks her work is just the best shit since Jesus himself walked the earth! I refuse to let this go and you can't make me!

Beltway: .... I'm tellin' Oki to double her efforts with hookin' you and Spectre up. You need something to distract you from this shit and maybe you'd stop being a raging bitch when a guy makes a simple suggestion.

Fang: If that's the case then go get Bertha and Four Eyes laid or some shit! Those two are mega-bitches!

Beltway: And you are the fuckin' dragon bitch, I think you take precedence this time.

Chris uncrossed his arms and diverted his gaze from you, “One more to add…” he chuckled nervously.

You scowled at him now, “Who did you tell?” you demanded.

“…Leon.”

“What?!” you exclaimed. “He wasn’t supposed to know! Ay dios mio!” you said the last part in your native tongue.

Beltway: We gathered that when you fuckin' said it in Spanish, ya fucking dumbass.

“I had to tell him! He would have accused you too.” Chris defended and you held your head in your hand as Chris sighed and wrapped an arm around you. “Sorry.”

You rested your head against him, sighing deeply and removing your hand. “That’s ok you have a point.”

Chris suddenly pushed you away at arms length, confused you looked up to see his serious expression. “Do you know a girl with blonde hair and green eyes? Young?”

Fang: Sherry! Has! BLUE EYES!

Beltway: It's you flippin' your shit over little things like this that help prove my earlier point, you know.

Fang: Shove it up your ass!

About to say no you stopped as you looked past him and at the picture he had of him and Claire on his bookshelf. The smiling picture of her face seemed to help you remember the person he was speaking of, “Only one.”

“Who?” he urged as Milla and Becky and BillyBenny listened in closely.

You looked back up towards Chris with a sad smile, “Sherry Birkin.”

“That little girl you three rescued from Raccoon?”

“Obviously she’s not so little anymore it’s been a couple of years.”

“Apparently Milla had a vision of her.”

“And?” you pressed.

“Milla saw Sherry with K19.”

Beltway: Apparently the Birkins never bothered to teach their damn kid about "stranger danger."

Fang: Tell me about it; the only difference is instead of using candy as bait she just shifted the blame for Sherry's mistreatment to Karla-Sue, Leon and Claire.

Your smile disappeared as it turned into a frown; you shook your head as Chris’s hands rubbed your arms tentatively.

“That must mean that Ricardo is with her too.” Chris added.

“Guys.” Rebecca interrupted as you both looked back at her. “I forgot to mention that Kaplan is getting released today, should we get him?”

“Chris and I will.” You say as Chris looked at you incredulously.

Beltway/Fang: YOU ARE A WANTED FELON!

“We’ll be back.” You then grabbed Chris by the collar and yanked him back out the door with him protesting along the way.

Fang:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Why isn’t she with you?!” a woman screamed in his ear as the man held it away while sipping down some coffee.

“Relax will you? And stop shouting in my ear, it wasn’t my fault. How was I supposed to know that her birth father was still alive had came back to rescue her?”

Beltway: It takes some serious fucking amounts of self-discipline to sit there and drink your fucking coffee as a raging bitch is screamin' in your ear. *stares pointedly at Fang*

Fang: *stares back unabashed, brow raised*

“Regardless of that, you should’ve gotten her anyways. Haven’t you heard of a sedative Demitri?!”

“Uh, yeah I have. They knock you out right?”

“Don’t be a smartass! You know that he’ll be mad if she’s not here in our hands!”

“I’m aware of that Rachel; jeez I could imagine that you look ugly right now since your screaming your head off.”

Fang: Was that supposed to be a clever observation?

“Fuck off! Get Karla Smith here on the double, or you have no job to come back too! If you don’t succeed I’ll send replacements to handle this!”

“Goodbye to you too.”

“Demitri I’m warn-” Demitri hung up on her as he continued to sip his coffee and stare at the people passing by his table outside the café.

He slipped a hand through his thick black hair and sighed, ‘You can run toots, but you can’t hide from Demitri Frost.’

Beltway: "Toots?" No one in their right goddamn mind who wants to be taken seriously ever says "toots."

Fang: It is seriously attractive when you all start pointing out these things!

Beltway: .... .... I'm not sure how to respond to that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a short but entertaining ride to the hospital where Kaplan was admitted; Chris was singing along to ‘The man who sold the world’ and just to piss him off you made a very interesting point; the song was ironically talking about Wesker. I mean, he would sell the world if he could, and you knew that. Chris however was really pissed and he decided to change the song and now it was on ‘Mr. Crowley’ it was a painful reminder of Zachary of course, but it was like this song too was talking about Wesker!

Beltway/Fang:

Arriving at the hospital much to Chris’s joy you both entered the building as you fumbled nervously with your fingers considering you were a wanted felon being harbored by your victims. Uneasiness and joy were your current feelings as the young nurse walked you down the white corridors and towards the tech’s room.

You three entered the room and as soon as you three did you found an empty bed; the blankets were thrown to the ground, and the tray of food was thrown on the floor beside the blankets.

“You said he was being released today.” You said with anger building up for some unexplainable reason.

“He was. We don’t let patients go home until someone picks them up.”

“Where is he?” Chris murmured to himself as he looked all around, just as he was about to look in the restroom he is surprised to be hearing from the BSAA. “Redfield here.”

Fang: What the hell does that even mean?

Beltway: I think it means some asshole called his phone. ... I think.

Fang: Oh, well why can't she just say that?

“Chris, Sheva was supposed to arrive early this morning at HQ. She hasn’t arrived; do you know where she is?”

Chris face paled as you stared at him with confusion, “She…didn’t arrive?”

“No, we understand her condition

Beltway: The puss only had a bruised hip, how the fuck does that manage to be called a "condition?"

but she agreed last night that she would come to HQ to have an assessment. She hasn’t been heard from all morning.” Chris let out a shaky breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding.

He made eye contact with you and answered, “I’m sorry, but I haven’t seen Sheva since yesterday.” He cut off the connection and asked the nurse to leave for a moment.

“Chris what’s going on? Who was that?” you asked as Chris buried himself in his thoughts. First Kaplan dissapears and now Sheva too. This had to be a coincidence; surely they both hadn’t run off together into the sunset right? “Chris!”

He looked back at you; face impassive, “Sheva’s gone too.”

Fang: Well, that was completely fucking pointless and rage-inducing!

Beltway: Speaking of which, c'mere. We're gettin' you laid.

Fang: Fuck you, no! I'm sitting my ass right here and prepping the next spork! The sooner I get these done the sooner I can stop lookin' at 'em!

Beltway: Which is exactly why you're a raging bitch who needs to loosen up. Get your fucking ass up and out this door!